#PTonICE Daily Show – Thursday, November 16th, 2023 – Your tribe dictates your vibe

In today’s episode of the PT on ICE Daily Show, ICE Chief Operating Office Alan Fredendall discusses how and why behind more carefully curating the digital & social media content you consume on the internet.


Take a listen to the podcast episode or read the full transcription below.

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Team, what’s up? Welcome to the PT on ICE Daily Show. Happy Thursday morning. I hope your day’s off to a great start. Glad to have you here on the PT on ICE Daily Show. My name is Alan. I’m happy to be your host. Currently, I have the pleasure of serving as the Chief Operating Officer here at ICE and a lead faculty member in our Fitness Athlete Division. Leadership Thursdays, we talk all things practice management, small business ownership, and general leadership tips for all of you out there who are leaders in your own way. Leadership Thursday also means it is Gut Check Thursday. This week’s Gut Check Thursday couldn’t be more challenging but also simpler than getting out there and hitting a 5k run or if you can’t run hit a 5k row. Great aerobic test. As I get more into endurance running, I would argue I’ve been learning to hate 5Ks the most if it’s a really uncomfortable distance to settle into kind of a longer, slower pace of, you know, you’re setting a good pace on the first mile. Dang, I’m almost a third of the way done. Second mile, third mile. can be quite an aggressive distance. It’s the most commonly programmed CrossFit workout if that surprises you. I’ve posted some benchmark times as far as percentiles for both the 5k row and the 5k run to kind of compare yourself to where I stack up against the general population. So have fun with that one. It’s good to test that at least once a year and see how your 5k has changed, especially if it’s a goal for you to get your aerobic, your longer energy system a little bit more efficient, and specifically to get better at maybe 5k runs. Some courses coming your way. Before we talk about these courses coming up before the end of the year, I want to challenge you that if you are in the market for an ice course, and you’re able to purchase a course before the end of this year, you should do that. Wink, wink, wink, right? There might be a change being announced soon that would make you regret not purchasing now. So you’ll see that maybe an announcement coming soon. courses before the end of the year we’re almost done we have some courses this weekend but that’s probably too late for you we’ll be off next weekend for Thanksgiving and then we have just three weekends left of live courses in 2023 December 1st through the 3rd that weekend you can catch Paul up in Bellingham Washington for dry needling upper body You can catch Zach down at his home base at Onward Tennessee for cervical management. Christina will be up in Halifax, Nova Scotia, A for Pelvic Live. Ellison will be down in Tampa, Florida for dry needling lower body. Cody will be on the road for extremity management out in California in the Bay Area in Newark, California. Brian Melrose will be in Helena, Montana for lumbar management. and Julie Brower will be on the road in Candler, North Carolina for Older Adult Live. That’s right outside of Asheville. The weekend of December 9th and 10th, we have Fitness Athlete Live. That’s your last chance to catch that course this year. That’ll be with Mitch Babcock out in Colorado Springs, Colorado. You can catch Extremity on the road again, this time with Lindsey Huey in Fort Collins, Colorado. And Older Adult Live, your last chance this year will be in Portland, Maine with Alex Germano. And then our very last course of the year, of course, we expect nothing less than a person of Paul’s caliber to be the last person working this year. He will be in Salt Lake City for dry needling his upper body. That’ll be the weekend of December 15th, 16th and 17th. That’s a three-day course. So if you’re in a state that needs a lot of hours like Washington, or Maryland, that’ll be a chance to catch a three-day version of that course. A course is coming your way from us here at ICE.

Okay, let’s talk about today’s topic. Your tribe dictates your vibe. You’ve often maybe heard the other way around. Your vibe attracts your tribe. How you carry yourself, your personality, your values, kind of attract the people around you that are maybe in your friend group, your colleagues at work, that sort of thing. I want to talk about it from the other angle your tribe dictates your vibe, of the people you choose to follow, whether they’re actual in-person people or specifically today’s topic, of the people you follow on social media can really dictate not only how you feel about yourself, care yourself, but of what you might begin to spend your time and money on for the worse or for the better. So I really, really, really want to stress that social media, I think, is destroying our society for the worse. Certainly, it has value in things like this and sharing information and education. from one person to a large group of people. But I think overall, we can begin to follow people who appear really relevant to our lives. But actually, if we do a really deep dive, we understand they actually have very little in common with us. And then ultimately, at the end of the day, we’re in charge of who we follow. Many of us are not on social media against our will. And so that the emails you subscribe to, the social media accounts you follow, all of this digital content that you consume can have positive or negative effects on you. And to really stress, if you take nothing else away from this episode, to be really diligent in the streams and feeds that you begin to curate as you begin to follow email newsletters, social media accounts, and the like.

The first point I want to make today is The pitfall of the internet, as it’s always been since its inception of consumer-based communication, is that it’s super easy to talk tough and sound smart on social media. We live in a very impatient, rapid-fire, fire-and-forget type of world now. You may not know, but certainly, if you work at all in customer service, you experience, that the average expected response time to an email or social media message is now 10 minutes or less by the average customer. That’s a study from Forbes from this year in 2023. I could say a whole bunch of crazy stuff right now on this podcast. I could say it in a social media post and I would have almost no side effects come to me because our society now is so rapid-fire, so fast, so consumable that you would consume this. Maybe what I’d say you would resonate with, maybe it would make you upset. It doesn’t matter because you will forget about it in three minutes when you scroll on to the next piece of content. on your social media feed or the next podcast episode that you queue up. The only regulation on what we say is from you all, from the consumers. What’s noticeable on social media is that the people who tend to be the most aggressive and make the largest blanket statements are often those who do so without any sort of evidence or support. They’re also not the people who tend to engage in the stuff that they create, right? They’re very aggressive. They fire something out there. They know it might make you upset. You might actually make a comment. And that’s kind of their goal, right? That drives their engagement up. That shows their post to more people. Maybe it further upsets people. It gets more comments. And what we need to realize is that cycle is kind of what fuels those people to have large follower bases, to be able to advertise different things to you. Hashtag, you know, ice barrel, try out your hashtag toe spacers, right? Those people are trying to strike a nerve on purpose to get more engagement, more followers, more followers, engagement equals I can make more money selling sponsored things to you. So we need to be aware of that trap that is out there for us on social media and be aware of the pitfall of the internet and social media itself of this very consumable temporary transient content and recognize if you’re falling for that trap of if you are getting upset and making comment or if you’re following people who make kind of outlandish, unsupported statements. If that makes you upset, again, the whole theme of this episode is why are you following accounts like that.

The second point I want to make of why are you following accounts like that is that you have nothing in common with the majority of people that you follow and obtain content from. You’re making less money than you want to. You’re working more hours than you want to. You’re not feeling as physically well or as fit as you want to. You’re not happy with how your body looks. Maybe you’re not happy with how your marriage is going how you’re raising your kids how your sex life is going, and how your postpartum recovery is going. You name it, you’re being told that whatever is wrong with you, X is Y with you. Y is the solution, right? You are not having a good life because you don’t wake up at 4 a.m. and do a 6-hour morning routine. You’re not having a good life because you don’t wake up and do a gratitude journal, use toe spacers, do yoga, meditate, do a cold plunge, or a sauna, or any of these other things that you’re told are the difference between this apparently very successful person and you. But often when you do your research, when you look behind who are these social media influencers, you’re often being sold solutions by people that are usually millionaires and who are usually millionaires, not because of the stuff they’re telling you that they do, but because they’re convincing people like you to buy the stuff that they’re selling. And that’s how either they are making their money or they’re maintaining the level of income that they already have, right? Or maybe they started out in life and mom and dad footed the bill for college and for grad school and for their first house and they don’t have a lot of debt and so they have a lot of extra time, they don’t need to work as much to become this social media influencer and begin to sell you supplements and Toast Facers and all this kind of stuff. And the more you listen to those folks about what’s wrong with you is that you’re not consuming this stuff, the more money they actually make and the bigger that asymmetry actually comes. What’s not said is that a lot of those folks have made their money by living what they’re doing right now, which is a very imbalanced life of working more than you want to in order to try to pull yourself up the socioeconomic ladder. You’re told that you’re burned out or whatever and really the cause of their success is doing what you’re doing right now and eventually getting to the point where their success comes to a level where they no longer need to work as much and maybe now they have more time to show you a video of them working out on the beach in Bali. And by the way, use my promo code Stephen10 for 10% off, whatever. And again, the more you consume that, the richer that person becomes. But at the end of the day, you do not have a lot in common with that person, yet you are trying to model your life after them, even though that’s not how they currently live their life. And maybe that’s not how they ever lived your life. These people are happy, healthy, and fit because they don’t have to go to work anymore. Or maybe they never had to go to work. They can wake up and do their morning routine and go surfing because they’re able to afford a full-time nanny to take care of their kids. Or maybe they don’t even have kids and they get 12 hours of sleep because they have a night nurse. Or again, maybe they don’t even have kids. And you get my point that they are living a very different life than you and maybe they never lived the life that you did. So it doesn’t make sense for you to spend a lot of your time consuming their content and buying the stuff they’re selling to somehow try to fix your life. Follow people who represent you, who represent your values, who are honest about where they made their money or how they got to the level they are at. I tend to follow people who are very upfront about how they got where they’re at by pulling themselves up from being very, very, very, very poor, working a ton, and pulling themselves up the socioeconomic ladder. Is that ideal? No, but sometimes that is life, as true as it can be. And I resonate a lot more with those people who say like, look like this was the way that worked for me. It may not work for you. And I appreciate those people who are honest that look, it was a lot of years of 100-hour work weeks, working multiple jobs to pay off my debt to afford a house, to raise kids, and kind of get to where I’m at now. And I really, really appreciate that transparency, especially more as life goes on. So, what can we do about this of recognizing that Social media is meant to be fire and forget, instantaneous, consumable? It’s meant to sell you things. It’s meant to show people who maybe have nothing in common with you that you want to see yourself become only if you buy these products. If that’s the way it’s designed, what is the solution?

The solution is to cut that cord, right? Take a serious examination of the accounts you’re following, of the newsletters you subscribe to, of in general the content you consume digitally via social media, email, whatever, and stop following stuff from people who make it seem like the only reason you’re not obtaining the fulfillment you want is that you aren’t buying enough of the stuff that they’re selling. Stop following accounts that tend to speak on best practices, but speak so dogmatically. Manual therapy sucks, it has no value. On the other side of the continuum, manual therapy cures diabetes, right? Stop following that stuff if you don’t actually believe that stuff. Some of us follow that stuff just to watch the comments and watch people argue, or maybe you’re even that person, spending your time that could be spent better elsewhere, arguing with people on the internet. I’ll be very honest, I used to be that person. If you knew me a decade ago, I was that person. I was that person yelling at people on Twitter. and Instagram and all the other social media platforms, and I’ve talked about this before, one of the biggest shifts in my life was meeting Jeff Moore, our CEO, who one day sent me a screenshot of all these comments I was making, all this time I was spending on the internet, on social media, and just said, is this the best use of your time to advance the field of physical therapy? And of course, if you really ask yourself that question, then the answer truly is no. So stop following that stuff. Stop following those accounts. Stop following people who tell you that the way you’re treating patients is wrong. If they are people who maybe don’t currently treat patients or have not treated patients in a long time, five years, 10 years, 20 years, or maybe people who have never treated a patient ever, right, that person who went from PT school, maybe right to a Ph.D., or a consulting job, or to work for an insurance company as an adjuster, and has no actual real-world experience. Why are you following content like that? Knock that off. Follow people who are in the clinic every day, who are trying to make it all happen, who are trying to blend manual therapy, patient expectations and beliefs, and fitness-forward lifestyle, getting people loaded, getting people addressing their sleep and diet. Follow people who put out content like that, not content that maybe just makes you upset at the end of the day. Follow accounts that make your life easier. Follow accounts that give you resources that you can provide your patients so you don’t have to work as much making that stuff yourself, right? Follow, obviously, I’m biased. I can’t not have any bias here. Follow us, right? Go to PTonICE.com, click the resources tab, and look at literally an endless list of ebooks, workshops, of patient resources already created for you to make your job in the clinic easier so that hopefully you don’t have to spend as much time making the money that you’re currently doing. You don’t have to work as hard doing it. Follow people in a manner that sees you working less and making more and not just buying more gadgets and $10,000 mentorship programs.

And I think finally, what I want you to resonate from today’s episode is to recognize deep down that there’s nothing wrong with you. If you work more than you want to and get paid less than you think you should, you are not damaged. You are a normal American, right? 77% of Americans live paycheck to paycheck. Half of all Americans work two or more jobs. It is totally common to work more than you want to, to try to get ahead. Again, some of us are trying to pull ourselves up a huge deficit, right? We’re trying to close a large asymmetry. We’re trying to go from the poor person who grew up in a trailer park to maybe the first person in your family to finish middle school or high school or undergrad and grad school and be the first person to own your own home and be the first person to maybe have a retirement account and actually be able to think about retiring. We’re trying to pull ourselves up multiple rungs. And I think for most of us, we believe that working a bunch is not how we get there. And I think when, again, we follow people who are more transparent in how they have their success. You’ll find that’s how they also got there, right? They didn’t toe space and cold plunge their way from the trailer park to owning their own home starting a family paying off their debt and being comfortable in retirement. So recognize that there’s nothing wrong with you.

Okay, challenge you. If you look at my social media account, if you look at my Instagram, you’ll see I have tens of thousands of followers. I don’t know who most of those people are or why they follow me. Yet, look at that ratio. When you look at the ratio of people who follow to followers, it is my belief that you should only follow people that you want to see content from. What you’ll see when you look at my account is that I only follow a couple hundred people, right? I follow close friends and family members. and people that I want to see content from. Again, my goal with social media is to curate a feed that makes my life easier with different tips and tricks about physical therapy, coaching, leadership, business, about all the different spheres I’m involved in. That’s how I curate my social media feed. I don’t follow people back who follow me if I don’t think they post any content, that’s certainly possible, or content directly relevant to me. And I think it’s okay if you have to unfollow those people. Some people may think that means they follow you. Well, hopefully, they follow me because they find value in what I post and I think it’s okay to not reciprocate if you don’t feel the same way. I’m sure the people who follow me that I don’t follow are nice upstanding people who treat their spouses and their children well hold the door for people to pay their taxes on time and leave a nice tip at the restaurant for the waitstaff, right? Not saying there’s anything wrong with them. It’s just I don’t believe that the content they create is beneficial to me, and otherwise, it just becomes an endless blob of noise that maybe as you start to follow and compare yourselves to, you start to feel bad about yourself. So take a step back. Why am I following these people? Is it beneficial to me? It’s okay to unfollow people, I promise you. I’m giving you permission, I’m giving you the blessing to do so. Cut that cord, recognize that you don’t have as much in common with most of the people that you follow, as you think you do, and recognize that a lot of those people are relying on showing you this grandiose awesome life in order to sell you stuff so that they can continue to live that awesome life of working out on the beach in the Caribbean and living in their mansion in Costa Rica and using dye-free detergent and eating organ meat and all the stuff you’re told is the reason that you’re not doing as well as you need to. Consider, that your tribe dictates your vibe. Who you follow can really make your day or ruin your day. It can make you feel bad about yourself. You could get caught comparing yourself. So just knock it off. Cut that cord. Hope you have a fantastic Thursday. Have fun with Gut Check Thursday. We’re going to be at a live course this weekend. Enjoy yourselves. I’ll be back here on Thanksgiving Day. So I’ll see you all on Thanksgiving Day. If you won’t be joining us, I hope you have a wonderful Thanksgiving. Have a great Thursday. Have a great weekend. Bye, everybody.

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